There is a heavy weight on my soul as I draw near the ending of this story. It is hard to imagine a pleasant or happy ending. Now mind you that was never the intention of the story, I have always intended this story to end in a less than pleasant manner. But I almost feel like I know Marcus now. Perhaps you all don't know him as well as I do. Since you are limited to what I tell you and I probably do not relay enough information. But Marcus is just a normal man who has realized he doesn't know anything about the people in his life. That everything he knows is probably a lie. That is a heavy weight. I feel that weight as I write out his story. I hope that I transfer some of that emotion to you the reader, because if I don't. Well, then I might as well not be writing it.
was sitting in front of the door. The house was so quite. He could
hear himself think or maybe he was talking to himself. It didn't
matter. He was on a forced vacation. He suspected it was better than
being fired. Nonetheless he was probably too tired to go back anyway. He hadn't spoken to
Abigail since she moved everything out a week ago. She said she was
staying with her sister. And that if he wanted to talk all he had to
do was call. Marcus however did not want to talk. He didn't want to
think or feel. Things had gotten dark the sun had set and Marcus was
no longer lost in the twilight. He was beyond hope.
Looking down at his hand Marcus realize how heavy the gun was. He had known before that they were so heavy. Everyone
always used them like they were toys in the movies. But they were
pieces of steel pieced together. Working flawlessly. He held the tip
of the barrel against his temple. It was cold and a welcome distraction. When the
steel was pressed against his head he forgot about everything. He
only felt, alive.
leg was shaking, a nervous habit he had never outgrown. His eyes were
clenched shut but he still noticed the slight change in light as the
keyhole lit up. The door did it every time Marcus was about to end
the pain. Yet, it never failed Marcus would take the gun away form his head and lean
terrible truth do you have in mind for me today?” looking through
the keyhole Marcus saw a room filled with ornamentation. They were
Christmas decorations. In fact the room was in Marcus' childhood
home. The same room he decorated every year with his brother. But not
this year. This was the year Marcus had decorated alone. Jeremy had
died that year. Into the room walked Marcus' mother and father. They
were talking. She was crying as she did that entire year.
was a good boy. I don't care what the police say.” Daniel, Marcus'
father, was angry. It was anything new. Daniel had been angry long
before the accident.
they said he had purposefully driven his car into that hillside. They
said it was the only explanation.” Pearl, Marcus' mother, was
weeping. She had always been emotional. Marcus remembered that every
time he got in trouble it would end with him consoling his mother.
he'd never do that. He was always so happy...” Daniel didn't seem
so certain, he anger abated somewhat, “wasn't he?”
walked into the room. He was fourteen at the time. He was always
angry. At least that is how he felt since the accident. He knew his
parents were keeping a secret, but they wouldn't tell him. The
stopped talking when he walked in the room.
you talking about the accident again?” Marcus was accusing. “Just
put it behind you. He's dead and he's not coming back. It's Christmas
for Christ sake.” Marcus left the room. He knew they were telling
secrets, but he almost didn't care he was so angry. He just wanted
his brother back.
fell off the chair. He was weeping yet again. The gun slipped from
his fingers. His hands were too weak to hold onto it. As it fell
through the air he had an instant of realization, then the gun went
off. He felt a burning flash of heat spray across his face. He then
saw blood running down the bridge of his nose. His eyes had spots and
his ears were ringing. He almost felt nothing. It was surreal as if
the world was blurring away slowly.
watched the pool forming on the floor. A slow line of blood worked
its way across the floorboards towards the door. He could hear it
dripping on the other side. The door goes somewhere was his last
thought as he fell into the puddle he had watched so intently.
Marcus awoke he was sure he was dead, but the sticky wet mess on his
face told him otherwise. As he felt his head he thought to find a
gaping hole of shattered skull and moist gray matter, but instead he
found a thin line of torn flesh. It was terribly tender, but the
skull seemed much intact. Looking at the gun and the blood he
wondered how he had survived, but he saw the stream and remembered.
door goes somewhere.” Marcus whispered as he stood up. He decided
two things in that moment. He would find out what was behind that
door. And Marcus was going to take a much needed shower.
I just want to apologize that I did not post anything last week. I went camping and didn't realize I wouldn't have service. I was going to post a note saying there would be no post. Alright enjoy tonight's post.
Greetings loyal readers. I am glad to see you have returned to my humble blog. I fear my language may appear strange in this story. I kept catching myself speaking in such a drab and old sounding voice(which in this situation of course means in the written sense and not the spoken) that I had to keep correcting myself. You see I watched some episodes of the Borgias today and that made quite a mark on my internal narration. I hope you don't mind. But please enjoy the now longest part of this increasingly large short story.
came to handcuffed to a chair. His head was heavy and throbbing from
the blow. He looked around and saw people staring and pointing. For
the moment he could not recognize them. One of them began to
approach. Marcus finally recognized her as a police officer. She
looked him in the eyes.
a real lucky bastard. Your buddy Thomas is hurt pretty bad, but he
refuses to press charges. I think you had better look yourself in the
mirror and ask yourself what your problem is.” the officer began to
take the cuffs off. “You're not going to assault me too are you? I
wouldn't advise it.”
won't attack you, officer.” Marcus still felt like his head was on
the verge of collapsing in on itself, but it was holding together for
now at least. “Am I free to go?”
gonna need a statement then you are free to get yourself home. Your
wife is waiting over there.” the officer pointed at Abigail. Marcus
looked at her, but he didn't want her to be here. He didn't want to
see her. She looked very distraught. She was talking to Thomas who
was being looked after by a paramedic. Marcus felt the rage boil up
again. He looked away for what little good it would do.
think I would sit here awhile. I fear my head isn't well. The pain is
quite intense.” Marcus did not lie, but his exaggeration seemed to
be enough. The officer asked for his version of the story and then
she left. Marcus was glad he wasn't going to jail, but he couldn't
help but feel indignant that he was at Thomas' mercy.
always envied Marcus, Marcus knew this deep down. Ever since they met
it had been Marcus who had everything. Thomas was in short term
relationship after relationship. Thomas was never the top designer.
Thomas was nothing without Marcus, yet somehow Thomas was stealing
looked over and saw Marcus staring. She started walking over he
looked away, but it was too late as her hand rested on his shoulder.
Marcus, what has gotten into you? Marcus look at me. You're scaring
everyone who loves you.” her woulds were desperate and sad. Perhaps
he could care for her, but never Thomas again.
tries to steal everything. I have worked so hard. And Thomas thinks
he just deserves it.” Marcus growled through his throbs of pain.
are mistaken Marcus. Thomas wants nothing, but good for you. He had
tried to dissuade Mr. Blake from promoting him over you. He told me
all about it. He didn't want you to know. But Mr. Blake said he
wouldn't even consider you. You were too valuable as a full-time
designer. Marcus listen to me. We all love you so much. Whatever is
going on inside your head, just come back to us.” she said all the
right things. Marcus couldn't believe them. He knew what he had seen
and heard with his own eyes and ears. The door was showing him truth
in a world of lies. These people didn't love him.
want you to move out, Abigale. Go live with Thomas. I know its what
you both want. I saw the way he touched your thigh that time and the
way you giggled with excitement. Just go. I'm through with you.” he
saw the tears now. She was a convincing actress. Perhaps she should
had gone to Hollywood. Abigail walked away in confusion. Marcus
smiled to himself as she went to the paramedic. The paramedic nodded
and followed her back over.
Marcus. I'm just gonna look at your eyes. I hope you don't mind. We
just need to make sure you didn't sustain a head injury. They are
quite common in these sort of situations.” Marcus was complicit
though he did not like that Abigail still stood there. Her tears were
breaking his resolve. “Good, good. Now let me check the wound. Tell
me how badly does this hurt.” A sharp pain went through Marcus'
entire skull as if he was struck yet again.
that hurt like hell you fucking idiot.” Marcus about punched the
man, but stopped himself.
You seem in perfect health for having a bronze statue blasted against
your skull. There appears to be no fractures, but we will take you in
and get your skull x-rayed, alright?” the man was entirely too
cheerful. Marcus hated him already, but he grasped at any opportunity
to get away from Abigail now.
take me there now. And don't let her ride with us. I don't want to
see her.” Marcus was placed on a stretcher and rolled away. It felt
better to be away from Abigail, but his realities were fighting none
the less. Marcus wondered to himself is Mr. Blake really didn't
promote him because he was too valuable.
Yet another exciting installment if I may say so myself. This one was quite fun to write and is thus far the longest entry yet for this story. It however should read rather quickly since it is actually one of the more action packed posts. But without further delay please enjoy this new episode of suspense and disaster.
Marcus completed the work he knew it was finally ready. He had changed the entire design. Where once was a
sunrise it was now a sunset. He didn't even know why it had been a
sunrise before. It was always meant to set. That is how he had seen
it in the sky only a few days ago.
Thomas came up the stairs Marcus was waiting for him.
it is. Everything is in order it will be ready for production by the
end of the day. Several days ahead of schedule I'd like to remind
you.” Marcus was confident in the work, however as Thomas looked it
over Marcus' smile faded.
changed everything. Almost reversed the entire design. Are you sure
this is still what you want? I'm not so certain of it. It seems
almost gloomy.” Thomas was being shrewd. He was simply surprised by
the changes. He'll come around this piece was genius.
will be fine Thomas. Believe me I know design. This will be a bigger
hit than the other one would have. And we don't have time for both. I
say we do this one.” with a slap on the back and a laugh Marcus
almost convinced himself, “Have I ever led you astray?” He knew
the answer he made this company. Without him it would have closed
years ago. So, he knew his vote of confidence would also push his
shoe through. It would be produced by the thousands.
I guess you're right. I never had the grasp on design you had.
Thanks. I'm glad you are excited about this. You're even getting me
excited. This will be good.” Thomas walked away. Marcus knew the
next step it was very like old times. A design meeting would be
called. During the meeting everyone would ooh and aah Marcus' work
and then the team would put it out for the fabrication team and soon
we would have them ready to sell and the company would profit.
time however things didn't go according to history. Everyone looked
at the shoe and visibly their excitement would lessen. Instead of
complementing him they averted their eyes. It was all wrong. It was
even worse when Mr. Blake walked in the room.
heard that Marcus was revealing our next blockbuster.” he walked up
to the designs and looked at them then looked at Marcus. He looked
back at the design and finally back at Marcus.
do you think Mr. Blake? Can we take it to production?” Thomas said
the words from the doorway he was only just coming into the meeting
room. He had a portfolio under his arm. Marcus knew what was in the
Thomas I don't think this shoe will go to production. It has a sort
of melancholy about it.” and then the room filled with voices of
agreement. Many were apologetic as they looked to Marcus, but it was
their overall concert of disinterest in producing that shoe.
afraid that was how you would feel. So, undenounced to Marcus I
worked on some of his preliminary designs for that shoe and I think
these are production ready.” Thomas took out the pieces he had
slipshod together. There was no art to them. It was simply a
recreation of Marcus' own work. Some slight color changes a thinning
of the star-burst and an angle loosened here while one was tightened
there. Overall it was identical however. Mr. Blake smiled as he
looked at the piece.
Marcus this is brilliant I have no idea why you change it.” Mr.
Blake gave Marcus the credit, but that didn't matter he may not have
even heard. Marcus was outraged that Thomas would reveal work he
thought unworthy and had specifically set aside.
whimpering shit. I have worked above you like a god and you think you
can take my leavings and use them to your own glorification. You
think to have my wife, my career, my work. Well take it all you
filthy whore. Maybe another day or two deep in Mr. Blake's asshole
will get you another promotion.” Marcus didn't know what he was
doing, 'I'm getting this abortion...' and her laughter filled his
ears as he punched Thomas' surprised face. Thomas fell to the floor
blood spilling on the gray carpet of the conference room. He saw the
silhouette touching his wife's thigh. She giggled with heavy lust
filled breath. Marcus managed to kick Thomas in the ribs before the
others started pulling him off. They held him tightly yelling for him
to stop. He couldn't hear them, 'I'm getting this abortion...'
Everything went black when one of them clubbed him over the head.
Well, this weeks post is pretty special to me. I really feel like the story just got some real traction. Things are going to move quite quickly here soon. I was wondering for a while if I hadn't accidentally started a novel instead of a short story, but no worries I see an ending on the horizon. I hope you enjoy this next installment.
fell to his knees. “I'm getting this abortion...” kept ringing in
his ears. It was all he could hear. He felt sick and weak at the same
time. She never even asked him. It was all he could do to stand. He
walked to the bedroom. Abigail was sleeping soundly. A small smile on
her face. Marcus ignored her as best he could. His grabbed his wallet
getting this abortion... I'm getting this abortion...” it was on
loop in his mind. All he heard the entire driving. Walking up the
stairs to his office he was numb with it. His mind was lost to the
power of those words. He of course was surprised when Thomas tapped
on his shoulder.
Earth to Marcus. You awake man? I need to know where you are on those
revisions. Remember I gave you a week. You need to have all the
revisions ironed out by tomorrow if you hope to be ready in time.”
Thomas almost sounded kind. Marcus didn't know if it was true or
simply in his head it didn't matter.
the revisions. I'll have them ready tomorrow. Let me print a copy of
what I have so far.” The copy printed and Thomas hardly seemed to
notice how distant Marcus' voice was as he listened to the
explanation of the revisions.
looks good to me. Remember I want this finalized tomorrow and ready
to go to the rest of the team so that everything can be set by weeks
end. These have to be done in time for our summer series launch.”
Thomas walked out the room. Looking back he saw Marcus with head hung
low, he did not stop.
numbness continued throughout the rest of the day. His once bright
and exciting project was now simply a tolerated diversion. His drive
home was a blink of an eye. He didn't remember getting to his house.
He didn't remember taking a chair upstairs. He didn't remember
sitting in front of the door for hours.
What the hell are you doing?” Abigail was shaking him. She looked
you do it?” Marcus was blank faced he didn't even look at her.
what? What is wrong? How long have you been here?” Abigail had
genuine concern on her face. Marcus was finally gaining his wits. His
legs were sore from sitting as he stood up next to his wife. Looking
her in the face he saw her confusion.
you really have an abortion? Was it mine?” Marcus looked at her.
Her eyes grew with shock. She looked away. Her face grew red quickly
and a tear formed and fell. Her knees gave out and she landed on the
did you find out about the abortion?” she still didn't look at him.
Marcus couldn't think of how to answer that particular question. He
didn't think the door telling him was a plausible response.
heard you talking to Jen one time. I guess with my job stuff I
thought it was time I found out.” Marcus knew it was a weak lie,
but hoped it would suffice. She looked up at him. Her whole face and
person was in disarray. Black eyeliner ran lines down her now rosy
cheeks. Her eyes were filled with red lightning and swollen near
closed. He wondered why he couldn't sympathize.
guess it doesn't matter. It was yours. I'm sorry. I didn't know if we
would even stay together. I was just starting college. I had so many
classes. I was working. It was all too much. I... I didn't tell you,
because I didn't really even know you yet. We had only been dating a
couple months.” she seemed genuine. Her pain was so real. The guilt
must have grown for years. Yet he still couldn't sympathize. It was
too hurtful a secret.
Marcus packed his bag he faintly heard her pleas behind him.
just need some space. I can't believe you lied to me like this.”
Marcus went outside and got in his car. As the engine started he felt
something be left behind. He pulled the car out and drove away. The
hotel down the street would have sufficed, but he had work to do. He parked
outside the door, he didn't bother using an actual parking spot. As
he walked up the stairs to his office he saw the sun setting in his
mind and he knew what he had to do.
Death stands guard without a word. Standing still as blood pours from his chest. In the blood you see the last moments of your life and are taken to your final resting place. Be it in Eternal Night or Eternal Day death does not judge he simply carries you on the path.
Inside us all the powers battle. Light and dark an eternal conflict. We can use our will to hold back our passions that will send us to destruction. Or perhaps we may bask in the primal pleasures of the physical calling death into our very selves. The choice is ours and ever rages on inside our very being. Hold tight to the will to be more than you are and grow in the light of the Eternal Day.
Light and Dark
Well I suppose this post is rather religious in its nature, but that wasn't the original goal. I was actually gonna just use a picture of me to design a shirt on my white t-shirt. Instead I ended up setting my basement to look like some sort of dark murder cave. So, as you can tell that inspired a completely different route than originally intended. I hope at the very least it was enjoyed.
Marcus is a lot like me. He thinks and reacts similarly to myself. Also, I can only remember things I don't want to and can't forget the things I want to. But I think he is probably much better at focusing than I am. I hope you enjoy todays piece.
day went by like a blur. Thomas kept his distance and Marcus was too
afraid to seek him out. Marcus didn't know what to think, the letter
seemed sincere. On the drive home Marcus saw another sunset the sun
seemed to be going away leaving nothing but darkness behind.
his dinner set when Marcus got home. It was a spread of leftovers. In
every way Abigail lacked in domesticity, she more than made up for in
personality. He remembered the first he saw her. He was waiting in
line in the dormitory cafeteria. She was serving mashed potatoes. Or
some sort of white sludge. Her hair was in a net yet it still shown a
beautiful auburn. She was talking to another server about this book
series. Some sort of knights and magic thing. She was glowing as she
discussed the story. She didn't even notice Marcus, but he noticed
they prepared for bed Marcus tried to remember the last time Abigail
had read a book, he couldn't. How had he not noticed before. Marcus
decided then and there he was gonna try and find Abigail a new book.
babe, do you remember what that book series you were reading in
college was called? The one with the knights and magic and stuff?”
Marcus tried to make the question sound off-handed.
let me think. That must have been the Mist Caller Chronicles. That's
pretty random though. What brought that up?”
was just thinking about the first time I saw you. I couldn't remember
the name of the books you were talking about.”
yeah. Those books were pretty lame in retrospective. Just some flimsy
love triangle with really flat characters, but you know sometimes
that stuff is nice.”
decided he wouldn't get her more of those books then. Obviously she
didn't read those any more. Maybe he could get her those vampire
books everyone was reading. She said she wanted to see the movies
when they had come out. Marcus decided he'd check the book store on
the way home tomorrow. It was time for bed.
Marcus slept all he saw was the figure caressing Abigail's leg. And
her laughter thick with sexuality chased him through the dreams. His
alarm went off right as he was about to distinguish the figure.
Showering and dressing had finally become mundane in the new house.
He knew where everything was and there was no more searching
required. He didn't even notice the door as he passed it. Going
downstairs he went to the kitchen and put some waffles in the
toaster. It was then that he noticed that he had forgotten his
guess I haven't completely gotten used to this new routine.”
up the stairs he watched the door as he ascended. A thin spray of
light was coming out of the keyhole.
again. I'll ignore it.”
he walked passed he heard Abigail's voice.
wouldn't understand.” The door was louder than usual. It was
back Marcus couldn't stop. He had to see what this new mirage was. As
the opening came into focus Marcus saw Abigail sitting in a waiting
room. She looked much younger this must have taken place during
college. Abigail's friend Jenny was holding Abigail comforting her.
They were both crying.
understand that you aren't ready to have a kid. You want to finish
college first.” Jenny spoke comfortingly.
Jenny. I'm getting this abortion and Marcus must never know.”